I have a drink problem…….

This post was first posted in spring 2012.

Good afternoon to you all. It appears that spring is finally round the corner and that means summer cannot be far behind.

For me summer means picnics, trips to the seaside, and lazy evenings spent in the local pub garden. Now im sure you are all thinking now that these type of activities give plenty of scope for drinking confessions, but with me that is not the case.  
Would you like to know MY guilty drinking secret?? 

Are you sure you can  handle it without recoiling with horror?? Promise you wont get the pitchforks out and banish me from blogging Twitter and the Interweb??
Okay, here goes………..

I dont like alcohol!!!!!!!

Tis true, when I spend the evening in a pub I drink cola (no ice, slice of lemon if your offering) and that is fine with me.

What is NOT fine, what annoys me more than I care to mention and actually makes me avoid many situations that involve a drinking establishment is peoples reaction when I tell them I would like a soft drink.

Usually the first reaction I get from someone who is not use to my drinking preferences is……do you have a drinking problem?
This  can come come in the form of feigned sympathy “oh I understand, my uncle/neighbour/best friends mum is teetotal” or  a completely blunt “why, are you a recovering alky”
No, I have never had a drinking problem, I do not have alcoholic parents, or any significant other that would put me off drinking, I simply DO NOT LIKE ALCOHOL. 

Why drinking alcohol is viewed as such a natural part of our adult lives that to not do so is automatically  seen as an indication of an addiction I do not know. I don’t like broad beans either, but no one has ever accused me of being addicted to them!

People that know me better than to think that I have a current/former alcohol addiction look for a different cause of my  ‘problem’.

They think it’s all a matter of taste.
They assume that I do not like the taste of alcohol,  and to some degree they are right. Beer, larger, wine….yuck!.

I am not keen on spirits (I remember the first time I swigged a mouth full of whiskey out of a bottle from my dads shed, I was convinced I had drunk some sort of poison he had put in an empty whiskey bottle, no way would anyone voluntarily drink something so vile). 

The hardcore drinkers believe I need to ‘man up’ in my attitude to alcohol. If I perservere long enough I will get use to the taste of ‘proper’ drinks like wine or spirits.

Other kinder ‘well meaning’ people look for drinks that I will like the taste of, usually alcopops or spirits diluted with pop, and it is true I do not mind the taste of these at all. In my drinking years I would happily drink diluted spirits as they did not give me bad hangovers.

Neither the man up or the alcopop alternative method is going to work now though because I DO NOT LIKE ALCOHOL. 

My  refusal to adopt the accepted drinking practices of the average UK adult is usually accepted by people once they realise it is not an addiction problem or a dislike of the taste. However there is a small group of people who continue to have a problem with this. 

The ones who do not buy soft drinks.
These people are the ones that keep me out of pubs, away from parties and any other occasion that usually involves drinking, as they consider it either a challenge to make me drink or an insult if I refuse.

I get the ‘im not buying you a drink unless its a proper drink’  speach. Well…..excuse me but what exactly do you think coke is? As far as im concerned its wet so therefore it is a drink. If people persist with this line, I simply buy my own all evening,  inevitably saving myself a bundle in the process. 

Some think they can simply ‘slip’ a vodka or similar in my coke and I wont notice. Purlease……. do I look stupid?? Well maybe I do, but I can still recognise the taste of vodka and I will not be tricked into drinking it. 

Neither will I be ‘shamed’ into drinking it as you have spent your hard earned money on it. If you chose to waste money on a drink I did not ask for thats your problem, I DO NOT LIKE ALCOHOL.

I think you maybe getting the picture now, I don’t like alcohol. I don’t like the taste of it, I think it is ridiculously expensive, I do not like hangovers and I do not like feeling drunk.

With the escalation of my anxiety and social phobia as I get older the need to be in complete control of myself is very important.  
These are all valid reasons not to enjoy drinking, but you know what??     I shouldn’t need to justify myself to other people and I shouldn’t have to experience harassment and bullying because I chose not to drink.

I will leave it there for today. If you are still here I thank you for taking the time to read my rather ranty outpourings. 

I wonder if any of you have experienced this type of behaviour from others because of drinking or any other lifestyle choice you have that doesn’t fit society’s norms.

I would love to hear your views on this post, so please add a comment or two Xx

58 Comments

  1. stellabranch

    August 4, 2015 at 8:08 pm

    Oh thank goodness! I thought it was just me!

    1. The Anxious Dragon

      August 4, 2015 at 8:44 pm

      There are a few of us out there, but were definitely not the norm are we 😀

  2. Twinmumanddad (@Twinmumanddad)

    August 8, 2015 at 10:06 pm

    I don’t drink either so can really relate to this. Quite often in work I’ve received alcohol related gifts. When I tell people I don’t drink they look at me as though I’m weird. I just don’t like it. Thanks for linking up to the #BinkyLinky Great post 🙂

    1. The Anxious Dragon

      August 8, 2015 at 10:17 pm

      Im begining to realise there are more of us non drinkers out there than I first thought. Thanks for the comment x

  3. Sian @ QuiteFranklySheSaid

    August 8, 2015 at 10:41 pm

    I went through a period of not drinking, for no reason other than I didn’t like it. And the amount of people that tried to make me drink was ridiculous! #binkylinky

    1. The Anxious Dragon

      August 8, 2015 at 10:47 pm

      It is a very strange way to act. I can only assume that some people feel less bothered by their own levels of drinking if they can ensure everyone else is drinking the same as them.
      Thank you for taking the time to comment xx

  4. helen gandy

    August 9, 2015 at 9:47 am

    I think it’s pretty awful when you get stick for not wanting to drink, we have a t-total friend and we all respect that. Good for you for sticking to your guns. #binkylinky

    1. The Anxious Dragon

      August 9, 2015 at 10:45 am

      I do indeed stick to my guns these days 😀 Thank you for taking the time to comment xx

  5. Nige Higgins

    August 9, 2015 at 7:52 pm

    Great post I don’t like alcohol either and don’t drink neither does my wife alcohol is the biggest killer in the UK today and nobody seems to care truth is if it was invented today it would instantly be bannned thanks for linking to the Binkylinky

    1. The Anxious Dragon

      August 9, 2015 at 8:07 pm

      It does seem ridiculously that something so dangerous can be seen as so accept by people. Thank you for hosting the link x

  6. @chelscoult3

    August 12, 2015 at 9:44 pm

    I absolutely LOVE this post! I used to love a good drink and spent 70% of my late teens very drunk! But since I started suffering with anxiety I hate alcohol! I could have 1 or 2 and be fine but even that has stopped now. Sometimes I do miss it as I’ve found people don’t ask me out as much because I’m not the fun Chelsea who loved a party.. I’m the one who will take the car and drink lemonade. It annoys me when people say ”do you not get bored just drinking pop?” but I can quite happily go out and drink soft drinks then drive myself home and wake up feeling fresh with embarrassing reminders of my drunken antics or a thumping headache! Cheeeers *clinks can of pop*

    http://www.lifeinthenorth.com

    1. The Anxious Dragon

      August 12, 2015 at 9:50 pm

      Its supprising how many people I know who do not drink because they suffer from anxiety. I have found I can act just as silly as my drunk friends if I chose to, but I have that level of control. Heres to the sober girls Xx

  7. Sarah Howe (@RunJumpScrap)

    August 14, 2015 at 7:13 pm

    Good for you! My MIL and my Grandparents never touch it and it shouldn’t be questioned. For people to accuse you of having a past problem is ridiculous. I like a drink but I mean a couple. I feel I have to justify not wanting to get drunk sometimes, like it’s boring. You are right; it’s expensive and my hangovers are awful. Great post xx #binkylinky

    1. The Anxious Dragon

      August 14, 2015 at 8:29 pm

      Thank you, I wish more people had that attitude x

  8. handbagssnot

    August 18, 2015 at 9:31 pm

    I know what you mean. There is such a pressure to join in the alcohol consumption if you are out having a “drink”. I just want a diet coke today!

    1. The Anxious Dragon

      August 18, 2015 at 9:33 pm

      Its odd how ‘drink’ and ‘alcohol’ are the same thing to many people. Thanks for taking the time to comment xx

  9. Rebecca @ AAUBlog

    August 24, 2015 at 12:15 pm

    I don’t drink either and it can be very frustrating. I don’t know why people ask so many questions though, if someone isn’t drinking, why do they need to explain why not? #snotallaboutyou

    1. The Anxious Dragon

      August 24, 2015 at 12:36 pm

      I agree, its nobodys business excpt your own x

  10. Alana - Burnished Chaos

    March 27, 2017 at 5:55 am

    I like wine and some lagers but I have to be in the mood for it. I could never have alcohol just because I happen to be somewhere that sells it. I very often drink soft drinks when I’m out. I used to get the odd comment when I was younger but nothing as bad as you seem to have experienced. I also hate the feeling of being drunk so I’ll very often have a couple if I fancy it and then switch back to soft drinks. I don’t understand why you should have to drink a certain thing just because everyone else it, it’s madness.
    #MarvMondays

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      March 27, 2017 at 7:23 am

      It really does not make any sense does it x

  11. franbackwithabump

    March 27, 2017 at 6:47 am

    If you don’t like alcohol then that’s your choice and I shouldn’t worry what anyone else thinks, it’s just a shame there’s still a stigma around it and people assuming you’re a recovering alchy! Thanks for joining us for #marvmondays x

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      March 27, 2017 at 7:28 am

      Yes, I think it says far more about the people who push me to drink than it does about me x

  12. Tubbs

    March 27, 2017 at 10:06 am

    Oh good grief. If you tell someone you want a coke, that’s what they should buy you! Would they insist on ordering your dinner for you at a restaurant if you ordered something they didn’t like?!

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      March 27, 2017 at 10:11 am

      Yeah, you can imagine it. ‘Im not buying you a vegetarian option, if im buying your meal you will have a ‘real’ meal with meat’

  13. Heather Keet

    March 28, 2017 at 6:10 am

    I don’t mind the occasional drink but I do not drink when I am not home. Everyone always stares at me and gives me grief also! #DreamTeam

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      March 28, 2017 at 6:17 am

      It never fails to surprise me just how threatened some people feel by someone who can enjoy themselves without drinking. They act as if it is a direct criticism of their drinking xx

      1. Heather Keet

        March 28, 2017 at 7:26 am

        I know, when really we’re just happy to be out with friends!

  14. Selena, My Rambling Thoughts

    March 28, 2017 at 5:41 pm

    I drink socially and little at that. And I’ve been that person that’s tried to buy a friend a drink and they only wanted a soda. I always felt I wasn’t “offering” enough when they requested that. Totally seeing your side on it though makes me understand that it’s exactly what they want and it’s ok. =) Thank you for your perspective on this! #DreamTeam

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      March 28, 2017 at 5:44 pm

      Yes, some people have said its a money thing where I have bought them a drink that is 2 or 3 times more expensive than mine they feel they need to reciprocate an equally priced drink xx

  15. Mom Of Two Little Girls

    March 30, 2017 at 6:54 am

    There is also a huge drinking culture in Africa. I drink, I won’t deny it. But my husband on the other end would rather have a coke zero 9 times out of 10 than alcohol of any kind. He’s also had all the jokes and wind ups, but fortunately he’s got ‘big enough shoulders’ that people don’t push him when they realise he’s serious. #ablogginggoodtime

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      March 30, 2017 at 7:44 am

      I really dont have a problem with people who drink. My hubby loves his ale. Some people assume that because I dont drink I must be judging them for what they drink though. Xx

  16. Susie / S.H.I.T.

    March 30, 2017 at 9:18 am

    Love this – I realy thought you had a problem with alcohol when I saw the title. Good for you not drinking booze because you just don’t like the taste – many would just endure it to be like everyone else. People can’t bear it when other people aren’t drinking alcohol I think as it makes them feel uneasy – really shouldn’t though, why should it make any difference? #ablogginggoodtime

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      March 30, 2017 at 9:28 am

      Yes, I really dont understand why people feel threatened by a non drinker. Im not judging anyone, im just there to enjoy myself xx

  17. LM

    March 30, 2017 at 1:05 pm

    I get the ‘im not buying you a drink unless its a proper drink’ speech.
    I get this a lot too – so annoying! Thanks for sharing #ABloggingGoodTime

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      March 30, 2017 at 1:14 pm

      Stupid isnt it 😕

  18. Liane

    March 30, 2017 at 6:48 pm

    I don’t drink either! In my early 20’s I would have one or two on a night out but never more than that. I haven’t touched alcohol since I fell pregnant with my eldest who is now 8 and I don’t miss it one bit 🙂 #MarvMondays

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      March 30, 2017 at 7:00 pm

      I was never a big drinker even when I did, so like you I dont miss it

  19. Hayley @Mission: Mindfulness

    March 30, 2017 at 8:38 pm

    Really interesting points – I do like the odd glass of wine but also get annoyed when I have chosen not to drink one night and then get pressured into having a drink and not ‘being boring’. We don’t have a healthy attitude to alcohol in the UK. #ablogginggoodtime

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      March 30, 2017 at 8:41 pm

      I agree, on the whole people have a very bad attitude to drinking x

  20. Rhyming with Wine

    April 2, 2017 at 6:40 pm

    Oh Tracey – this was posted about 4 weeks before I entered Blogland and so I missed it first time around. I’m totally with you. Despite the blog name I very rarely drink now and I actually don’t particularly enjoy the idea of being drunk any more. I have even used the odd “sorry – I can’t drink tonight, I’m on some medication” line. Why should there have to be a line though? Why can’t it just be OK not to fancy a drink tonight thanks? Very well said. Thanks for sharing with #DreamTeam. It’s fab to see you here! xx

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      April 2, 2017 at 6:54 pm

      Lovely to see you back linky hosting my dear xx

  21. Jo (Mother of Teenagers)

    April 3, 2017 at 9:36 pm

    Well done you. Stick to your guns. #ablogginggoodtime

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      April 3, 2017 at 10:28 pm

      Oh yes, im too stubborn to be bullied these days x

  22. edieseden

    April 4, 2017 at 1:30 pm

    Why is it that you have to add alcohol to your glass to convince others that you’re gonna have a good time? I’ve always thought alcohol drinkers feel less guilty if you join them. Good for you for sticking to your guns. Cheers, with a soda!

    1. Hooks and Dragons

      April 4, 2017 at 1:32 pm

      Yes, I agree that it says more about how some people feel about their own drinking than it does about my drinking habits x

  23. Mummy in a TuTu (@mummyinatutu)

    April 6, 2017 at 4:28 am

    I used to drink loads pre-pregnancy and now… it took me a whole year to have even one drink and now will have the odd g&t but swear i think that something will happen if i do! Mad.
    Thanks for linking to #ablogginggoodtime

  24. Alan Herbert

    May 13, 2017 at 9:51 pm

    It’s a sad state of affairs that someone choosing not to drink is treated in such a manner.

    Would a smoker behave this way to someone who said they don’t smoke when offered a cigarette? I think not.

    Unless behind the bar I don’t like pubs really so when I have to go end up drinking faster than I should and getting completely drunk. I also hate that feeling. I wish I could go and happily have a coke.
    Alan Herbert recently posted…Over The HillMy Profile

    1. hooks_and_dragons

      May 13, 2017 at 11:49 pm

      If you ever visit the forest again I will treat you to a pint of coke x

  25. Pickinguptoys

    June 1, 2017 at 11:07 am

    I love this Mrs A, I am the same!People look at me like I’ve lost it when I say I don’t really enjoy drinking anymore!I just don’t enjoy that feeling of not being in control.I’m happy with half a coke!!
    Pickinguptoys recently posted…My Pocket Money Toy Subscription Box – MayMy Profile

    1. hooks_and_dragons

      June 1, 2017 at 11:38 am

      If says a lot more about peoples feeling about their own drinking than it does ours when they feel threatened by us x

  26. wendy

    June 1, 2017 at 2:45 pm

    A great post, and well said. I must admit, I’m one who definitely likes a drink (or three) and there does seem to be a whole reluctance to accept that there are actually people out there who just don’t like alcohol. That’s up to them, and their choice, just like it’s mine to enjoy the booze.
    I think the fact that people are so concerned at the fact that you’re not drinking is because it’s making them look at their own drinking habits more closely.
    wendy recently posted…Tom Hardy and Cbeebies – sexist nonsense or not?My Profile

    1. hooks_and_dragons

      June 4, 2017 at 6:05 am

      Yes that is my conclusion too xx

  27. Rich

    August 2, 2017 at 8:15 pm

    I get this, don’t get me wrong, I don’t dislike alcohol but I’m not that fussed. If I go out I would prefer to drive so I know that my wife/friends etc can get home safe, plus as my children are very young I would prefer them not to see me drunk, and what if they needed to go to the hospital for any reason? I couldn’t take them if I’d been drinking. I may have one beer a week and that’s about it. Thanks for linking to #oldschoolposts

  28. adam

    August 2, 2017 at 8:24 pm

    The only time I ever drink is the occassional JD and coke. When out with the youngsters, it’s handy as when I switch to coke after one drink, everyone presumes i’m still drinking. Sad that I have to pretend isn’t it.

    1. hooks_and_dragons

      August 2, 2017 at 8:31 pm

      Ah yes, faking it like that is a useful way to deal with it x

  29. Bec Webb

    August 2, 2017 at 10:19 pm

    I don’t drink either! I used to, pre-kids, but I stopped for pregnancy and have drunk alcohol only once since then, at a wedding. So in 4 years I’ve had one alcoholic occasion. It’s not that I don’t like it – I do. I just don’t see the point. I have kids to look after, I don’t want to be drunk, or hungover whilst doing so! A lot of people think I’m crazy for not drinking. But why? Why is it so important to drink alcohol? THAT is crazy. I can quite happily relax, or have fun, sans booze.
    But that’s not to say I plan on staying alcohol free forever, who knows – maybe I will, maybe I won’t. But if I do drink alcohol again I’ll do so because I’ve chosen to, and not because people think I should to survive life!
    Great post. #oldschoolposts

    1. hooks_and_dragons

      August 2, 2017 at 11:51 pm

      Exactly. The idea that you are missing out by not drinking alcohol is quite odd x

  30. Sarah MumofThree World

    August 10, 2017 at 6:44 am

    So pleased to read this because I don’t like alcohol either! I never have. I tried a sip many times between the ages of 17 and 25, but I just didn’t like it. So I decided not to drink and I have no regrets. The response I usually get is ‘you’re so good!’. No, I’m not good, I just don’t like it! I’m horrified that people would slip alcohol into your drink!
    Sarah MumofThree World recently posted…Still Daddy’s girlMy Profile

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